The occupants of the van were a bunch of 'musicians' from the western suburbs. The band was called The Chevrons and the van was called Wewe Van (an anagram of New Wave).
Someone disturbed the drummer.
'Oi you bastard, you woke me up, I was `avin a souwester.'
'Surely you mean siesta.' Corrected Feedback, the bass player, a character about whom most people would have said that his most striking feature was the intelligent look he acquired whist wearing spectacles. This was a totally false impression as he never wore spectacles, just as Bogey never said 'Play it again Sam.'
'No, I meant souwester, it was gonna be a wet dream ......Weren't it?'
It was his penchant for such exchanges that had required the rest of the band to christen him "Wernit", and then, jealous that the drummer and the van should have such imaginative nicknames, decide that stage names should be issued all round. The guitarist became Jed Thruster, the male singer became Buddy Jet and the Gallic ex-bass player, now manager and driver, had been forced to accept the nom de plume of The Frog. No one dared tamper with Ana Marie, their seventeen year old prima donna who insisted on calling Jed Meatlump, which everyone shortened to Lump.
'LUMP!.....I wanna stop and buy some beer!' Wernit appealed like a hopeful bowler.
'We agreed I was Jed Thruster.' Lump replied. 'And we're fucked for time, we ain't got time to stop.'
'Lumpy Wumpy, I need to buy cigarettes,' Ana Marie cooed.
'OK, shout when you see an offie.'
'I don't think that's a good idea......I don't.' It was a habit with Feedback that he always repeated the verb at the end of every statement.
The van had one whole wall dedicated to graffiti; each member had made a contribution: Lump had scrawled, 'Apart from that what did you think of the play, Mrs Lincoln?' While The Frog had puzzled all but the most astute with: 'You should treat your lady's tits like a hamster.' However the most ingenious had to be: 'I think therefore I am........I think.' credited to Feedback but actually written by Buddy Jet. It was Buddy who once answered a heckler calling for anarchy, 'We tried it but it all just fell apart.'
'Shit, look at this traffic.' Lump observed.
The van groaned and ground to a halt behind a stream of traffic waiting for the lights at Harrow Road.
'Dunno why they don't build a flyover or something.'